I was driving home the other night and heard "I'm going to miss her" on the radio. I can't remember who sings it, but basically it's about a guy who loves to fish. His wife tells him if he goes fishing again, she will leave him. Hence, the name of the song. The chorus is basically an "Oh well, she's gone" sentiment -- "I'm going to miss her. Oh, lookee here, another bite."
I find the song really sad.
First, I don't think I would ever give my avid fisherman and hunter an ultimatum about something they love doing. As much as I complain about him going fishing every weekend he's not out hunting, I know he really enjoys it. And, I can't see myself telling him not to do something he loves that much. Besides, it sometimes lets me have some alone time.
Second, I'm afraid I would become the wife in the song. I know my husband loves me. But, I think part of me is afraid that if I hit him on a bad night, he would go off fishing just to spite me. And I think it would be utterly humiliating to have to tell my friends and family that I told my husband to choose me or fishing and he chose to go fishing. Serious blow to the self-esteem!
Third, I don't think giving an ultimatum is quite fair in this case. My husband lives and breathes hunting and fishing most of the time. Telling him to not go fishing is like telling him not to breathe. Besides, my rule of thumb is that if my husband had the vice before we got married, then I can't nag him about it. He provided full disclosure of his hobby well before the wedding. I knew it and I chose to accept him -- hunting and fishing and all. If my husband significantly increased the time he went hunting and fishing, I might have to re-evaluate. But, if anything, he goes out less. So, I keep my mouth shut. Well, most of the time, anyway.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Saturday, February 5, 2011
Surviving in-between Florida hunting seasons
"You need to go out to the woods," I told my husband. "I need more material for my blog."
That's when he broke the news. The deer and hog hunts are essentially over for the area he hunts. We have to wait until turkey season for him to go out again.
That's a few months away -- sometime in the spring. My husband isn't much of a turkey hunter -- it's a lot of work to go through for something you can buy plucked and cleaned at the grocery store. But that's another blog topic.
The purpose of this blog is to help the hunting widow get through this in-between time. Of course, there is the cleaning to do. The husband's hunting camp for the most part comes home in January, which means there are lot of clothes, sleeping bags, towels, blankets, etc. to clean. It's amazing just how dirty these things can get. The hunter now also gets together his inventory to see what he used and what he needs to have replenished in time for the next hunting trip.
The phone calls are endless. It's as if the buddies go through campfire withdrawal about two weeks after the last hunt is over. They go on endless talks reliving the best kills, laughng at the guy who fell asleep in his tree stand and missed the 8-point buck and wondering about next year.
The hunter misses his hunting weekends. He'll start poring over catalogs from Cabela's and Bass Pro Shops, and start planning his trip for next year.
But this year has been a lot different. My husband has grown up and really played his part as a good dad. He's missed many of his designated hunts -- hunts he put in for months in advance -- so he could attend our child's plays, games, even birthday events. So, he hasn't been out all that much. Now the hunting season has come and gone.
I am not sure how to handle this new hunter. It seems strange for me to push him out to the woods, especially since I've spent most of our married life trying to pull him back home. But I want to keep writing the blog. And so, I tell him, he needs to go out scouting or something, just to give me some content.
I can't very well call myself a hunting widow if my husband is at home during hunting season, can I? Oh well, I'm sure it's just a phase my husband is experiencing.
At least there's no problem with his fishing. He's out casting his lines almost daily these days.
That's when he broke the news. The deer and hog hunts are essentially over for the area he hunts. We have to wait until turkey season for him to go out again.
That's a few months away -- sometime in the spring. My husband isn't much of a turkey hunter -- it's a lot of work to go through for something you can buy plucked and cleaned at the grocery store. But that's another blog topic.
The purpose of this blog is to help the hunting widow get through this in-between time. Of course, there is the cleaning to do. The husband's hunting camp for the most part comes home in January, which means there are lot of clothes, sleeping bags, towels, blankets, etc. to clean. It's amazing just how dirty these things can get. The hunter now also gets together his inventory to see what he used and what he needs to have replenished in time for the next hunting trip.
The phone calls are endless. It's as if the buddies go through campfire withdrawal about two weeks after the last hunt is over. They go on endless talks reliving the best kills, laughng at the guy who fell asleep in his tree stand and missed the 8-point buck and wondering about next year.
The hunter misses his hunting weekends. He'll start poring over catalogs from Cabela's and Bass Pro Shops, and start planning his trip for next year.
But this year has been a lot different. My husband has grown up and really played his part as a good dad. He's missed many of his designated hunts -- hunts he put in for months in advance -- so he could attend our child's plays, games, even birthday events. So, he hasn't been out all that much. Now the hunting season has come and gone.
I am not sure how to handle this new hunter. It seems strange for me to push him out to the woods, especially since I've spent most of our married life trying to pull him back home. But I want to keep writing the blog. And so, I tell him, he needs to go out scouting or something, just to give me some content.
I can't very well call myself a hunting widow if my husband is at home during hunting season, can I? Oh well, I'm sure it's just a phase my husband is experiencing.
At least there's no problem with his fishing. He's out casting his lines almost daily these days.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)